Urban Poetry Poets: Cassie Brown

My name is Cassie Brown, I'm 18 and I live in Australia. I've got no real writing experience...just the usual frustrations and something to say. I live with my two lovely housemates and our cats, Ollie and Abacus.

In between menial customer service jobs, full-time uni and attempting to have a social life I've been churning out a few poems...feedback is love!
 

Poems:

For Haloween, I wanna be yours

Maybe one day, if it feels alright
But this is who we are tonight

Hearts race, drenched in sweat
Skin burns, haven't touched you yet

Last year we dodged a tragedy.
So how'd I let this happen?
Cause and effect lost together
"I wanna taste you", licking, lapping

And maybe one day it'll feel alright
But this is how it is tonight

Blood boils, feverish, excited
Thankful it isn't unrequited

Such a pretty colour
I'm trying not to stare.
You whisper things I wanna hear,
You're so far over there

Maybe one day, if it feels alright
But i'm not yours tonight

 

 

Stubble flecks smooth skin
Hair matted with sweat
Teeth in need of brushing
Not fully awake yet

Bleary-eyed and groggy
I move towards your warmth
Gravitating wordlessly
Eyes closed against the morn
'Running From The Morning After'

This night died premature
In day's cold light we're naught
But mates, two casual pals
Whose hands stay where they ought

Draw the shades, close that door
To trap this feeling in
We'll just camp out in bed
No morning, no chagrin

 

 

I've been trapped and frozen
Waiting for the past
Not even realising
My future's coming fast

Once upon a time
I loved a blond- haired boy
but he left me broken
Played me like a toy

And I like to think
I'm made of cold, hard steel
Then you play my song
And I can't help but feel
Thawing Far Too Late

So you came along,
woke me from this spell
Ice-queen brought back to life
By a fire she can't quell

I was late to ge here
Timing's not my thing
But i'd wait all day
To be there when you sing

 

 

It's been oh-so-long
I'm so sorry I've been gone
I've been busy...
Losing time with you.

Nothing used to matter
Except for me to be with you
But they've all lasted longer than
Longer than we do
"Hi, it's me..."

I'm making an effort
To touch base- like friends do
But that's only pretence
I know you know it too

It's been oh-so-long
I know you're sorry you've been gone

Yeah, I've been busy too

 

 

Did You Know You're Changing Me?
 
You see the world in pictures
Wish I could see it too
You leave me all the red ones
I can't believe you knew

I am cold and soft and smooth
Makes me warm, the way you move

And you can do dry humour
Like nobody else can
Though I get messed up sometimes
You seem to understand

I am quiet, bookish- a little out of sync
You cloud my head with nerves, gots to have a drink

You never get resentful
When my marks are high
I think I'm the only one
That can make you shy

I am cold and soft and smooth
Next to you, don't wanna move
 

 

 

Thankyou for the sleeping pill
 
Sweetness and sarcasm
Giggle and kiss and mock
Is this how its supposed to be?
Cause i'm watching the clock

So easy, mess-free, pain-free
And that is what I am:
Held steadily in place.
You keep out the mayhem

Not a tear shed
No sleep lost
No heartbreak
Though love's the cost

That's fine, I will take it
Pay the price over and again
Anesthetized in your arms
A peace I could not feign

 

 

Are your corneas intact?
 
 
I see the same things you do
Through eyes a lot like yours
Yet you see perfection
Where there are only flaws

I'm drunk on the adjectives
I'd never think to use
For me, at best a tomboy-
Too easy to refuse

And yet under your gaze
I do metamorphose
Reconciling myself
With this girl you interpose

 

 

 

I'll find my way back to you
 
You say I see the world
Differently to most
Sometimes it feels true
As I observe- a ghost.

But I can feign it well
I know just when to laugh
Or nod to show I'm listening
So I've fufilled my half

But sometimes you catch me
Staring into space
I see your concern
Etched on your pretty face

So I guess I'm sorry
I'm not always really here
But please know that when I'm well
My mind's with you, my dear

 

 

 

Decoder Ring For My Silence
 

Strong, tan hands
Number the knobs of my spine
A thrill, a chill
Each touch claiming 'you're mine'

Lips caress
My neck, pulse pounds beneath skin
I would speak, but
I knoweth not where to begin

I do confess,
to be overwhelmed by this.
I simply move
With you and hope you know- it's bliss.

 

 

I Don't Need Three Of a Kind to Win

 A scratchie, two band-aids
One shopper docket
I carry the memory
In my back jeans pocket

The guy behind the counter
Lent us each a coin
To scratch the litte panels
Then he grabbed one to join

The scratchie came up nothing
Some would think we lost
But I knew that this night
Was worth any cost

We walked until my feet bled
Then you called a cab
We teased and mocked and scorned
Each blow a loving jab

And when we finally got there
We fell straight asleep
I know you think I'd choose sex
But it's this I wanna keep

 

 

Lullaby

 An arm around the shoulders
Careful kiss atop my head
Vaguely reminiscent of
Putting a child to bed

Heart-wrenchingly tender
I'm cradled to your chest
I struggle with my eyelids
Night puts me to the test

I don't really listen
Just let your words float by
A soundtrack to my sleep
On which I can rely

 

 

Friday Night
 
I knock back a drink
Got my eye on the phone
You said I had your heart
Wish I'd known it was a loan

And I wonder how long
Before I do forget
To sleep on just my side
It hasn't happened yet

So I'll take his idle chat
And another drink
Inhale the fog of music
Til, Mercy- I can't think

 

 

Just a boy and a girl
 
Flick the light-switch downward
Immerse we two in dark
With other senses heigtened
I still don't feel a spark

Then I come to realise
We are just silhouettes
So it could be with him
I'm entwined, a sweet duet

I close my eyes and
Slowly, let his ghost creep in
An incubus creating
Flash burn across my skin

He's a spectre in between us
More real than this can be
But when you say we're special
I just nod and agree


And when all is over, done with
I feel the guilt begin
Beholden in the knowedge
That lying is a sin

 

 

14 Today
 
I woke up one mornin'
And when I turned around
You wore the body of a woman
And a face that could astound

I didn't understand it
The boys all stoped to stare
But you were still a child
Completely unaware

Coupla years gone by
You know the power you wield
I still sometimes see the child
That your make-up has concealed

 

 

White with Two

 Wrap my pale hands around
A mug in your cold room
Let the coffee re-ignite
The fire we've consumed

I'm mostly milk and sugar
While you take yours black
I see the cup start shaking
As your fingers trace my back

Put the mug down safely
I start to lose my breath
Turn my head to face you
Boy, you scare me half to death

Set my body buzzing
A strange and burning high
Could say thats it's the coffee
But we both know thats a lie

 

Well...That'll leave a scar

 I get childishly startled
By a loud male voice
I'll take a woman's anger
Given any choice

I'm fiercely independent
Stubborn to last
More than once landed myelf
In a plaster cast

And I hate confrontation
Part of me is still
Hiding under the table
Hoping for your goodwill

A little girl cries 'monster'
And thats what she should fear
Not the man that should
Have always held her dear

 

Death By Vodafone
 
Phone vibrates at 3am
I flick it open, closed again
I know is just you cancelin,
And I don't need to read that

I dial your home phone by heart
You're distracted from the start
I see you're just playing your part
And I don't need to hear that

I only talk to your voicemail
Your mother knows of my betrayl
She'd hate to see me in that veil
And don't you think I know that?

My phone rings and God, its loud
I wanna answer but I'm too proud
I'll claim I was in a crowd
And you will just accept that

The next night I'll cave and call
And be careful to keep talk small
Cause i know we're headed for a fall
And I can't stand to feel that

 

 

2 tickets to Central, Thanks
 
Lets go someplace new
Where no-one knows my name
Where what we wanna do
Won't carry any blame

Though I used to think
This secrecy was hot
My heart starts to sink
Realising what we're not

I wanna hold hands
And trade food off our plates
I wanna go see bands
And call our hang-outs 'dates'

Can't kiss you goodnight
If we're out with our friends
In bed we fit just right
Maybe thats where this ends?

So lets go somewhere strange
Just to play pretend
Lets not hide for a change
So I can say 'boyfriend'
 

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